Category Archives: Memoir


Rehashing:  A meditation on (not) letting go In my 20s I rushed to keep myself from feeling. In my 30s I rushed to figure out what I was feeling, under penalty of death. In my 40s I was crushed by overwhelming feelings upon the death of Andrew, my younger son.  What ifs by the thousands, […]

What’s on your dining table?

On a Sunday morning, I look up from the bottom of my empty espresso cup, set the cup down next to my laptop,  and consider whether and, if so, when to get on my bike and go for a ride. My eyes drift to the big sliding door to the deck. I calmly note the […]

Twenty-Six and the Ugliest Cake

I feel vaguely guilty whenever I leave this bench.  It’s a white bench, made of marble.  It sits along a pathway through the campus of a private school in a suburb of Seattle.  On one side of the horizontal slab, black carved letters in a swooshy font spell out my son’s name.  His birth date.  […]


I received a very nice phone call Saturday. The caller was Pam Binder, of the Pacific Northwest Writers Association. She told me that one of my essays, “Telling Him,” is a finalist in the PNWA’s annual writing contest, in the Short Adult Topics category. I’ll find out exactly where I finish when I attend the […]

Marketing and Ministry

I’ve finally concluded that my high school guidance counselor was right, about one thing. When I was a junior at Aragon High School in San Mateo, CA, Mr. Franceschi called me in to talk about college. My PSAT scores were good, my grades were pretty good, but I hadn’t given any thought to college.  He […]

What is Trieste?

And how is Trieste relevant to my story? Fellow writers, upon reading an early version of my book, challenged me with a question:  “You’ve written about your own experience and your experience with your children, but you’ve hardly mentioned your father.  You didn’t show up to the challenges fatherhood a blank slate.  How did he […]

Why write a memoir?

My inspiration came from the reactions of friends and family to emails I wrote while my son Andrew battled brain cancer.  They wanted to know what was going on.  Each time I was about to hit “Send,” I couldn’t help but feel that I was imposing on them, or at least depressing them with the […]